Forgotten Past
by michebabyblue
Summary: Meredith's history comes back to haunt her after Derek performs surgery on Archer. Will the couple be able to stay together through it all, and is the other Grey safe as well. Set during the cross-over with Private Practice. Rated M for mentions of rape
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**A.N My first Grey's Anatomy fic, It's totally my best friends fault that I'm now fully addicted to this awesome show. I don't know if this has been down before but if it has I'm sorry but I didn't get the idea from you. This takes place during the cross-over.**

**Chapter 1**

Meredith was on the walkway looking down on Derek, Addison, Sam and Naomi laughing and joking in the lobby obviously about to go over to Joe's, Derek had asked her to come but her shift hadn't finished and she wanted him to spend time with his old friends alone. Christina was walking away probably going to check on her interns making sure they weren't getting up to any trouble. She sighed as she watched her boyfriend interact with his ex-wife and old med-school friends. The shrill of her cell-phone brought her back to reality. Looking on the screen she saw the number was being displayed as unknown.

"Hello" She was trying to figure who it could be as she had everyone's number stored in her phone, she even had Lexie's number though she couldn't exactly remember when she would've got it from her half-sister.

"Oh Meredith it's been far too long since I've had the pleasure of hearing your voice" Meredith froze as the calm smooth male voice filtered over the phone. It was a voice she had prayed she would never have to hear again. There was a slight chuckle on the over end before the voice spoke again.

"Don't you have anything to say my dear? If I remember correctly sometimes people can't get you to shut up." Meredith couldn't move yet she was aware that she was looking directly at Derek trying to get some courage from just being able to see him. As if he felt her eyes Derek looked up smiling at her, he then frowned when she didn't appear to respond.

"Well never mind soon enough we will be face to face, and if I've heard correctly there's a little sister for me to enjoy as well." This snapped Meredith out of her stupor, to snap back at the person.

"If you go anywhere near her you'll wish your mother had never met your father." After another slight chuckle the man hanged up. All her strength left her and she collapsed to her knees, distantly hearing Derek's panicked voice. All she could focus on was the call she had just received.

Derek was laughing as Sam told another med-school story, he could sense a pair of eye's on him and looked up to see Meredith on the upper walkway on her phone. It still amazed him show she could take his breath away, her simplistic beauty turning him on more than Addison ever had with all her designer clothes and shoes. Smiling up to her he hoped to get a smile or a slight wave but nothing she just stood there looking at him like she was frozen.

He then saw her pale before speaking into the phone then before he knew it she collapsed onto her knees. Before he could even process it he was yelling her name and moving to the stairs to reach her. He didn't register that everyone had stopped what they were doing to watch him, nor did he know that the other doctors he was laughing with mere seconds ago was know following him as he rushed up to his fallen girlfriend.

Skidding to a stop on his knees Derek gently grabbed Meredith's upper arms and turned her to him. He was confused and worried by the lack of emotion in her eyes; he was taken back to the time right after he had chosen Addison all those months ago. But now he knew he wasn't the cause of it and Miranda Bailey wasn't going to stop him from comforting her.

"Mere what's wrong? I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong." He swallowed as her eyes began to fill with tears as she turned her gaze on him, and opened her mouth to speak, almost to quietly for him to hear.

"He's found me, he's found me" Meredith kept muttering the words as she lent into Derek trying to get all the comfort she could, from the one person she trusted the most.

"Derek?" Derek closed his eyes and gathered Meredith closer at the sound of his ex-wife's voice. Sighing he looked up to the red headed neo-natal surgeon with one thing on his mind. Calming down Meredith so he could get some answers was his first priority. Anything else could wait.

A.N Is Meredith a little out of character? I know Derek was already on planning on asking Meredith to marry him, so it is going to come up eventually but I couldn't remember if Mark mentioned that to Addie at the bar or if it was before that. Please let me know if you liked it or not.


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**Chapter 2**

"Page the Chief, Bailey, Yang, Stevens, Karev, O'Malley and Mark" he said the last name a little reluctantly be he knew that Meredith had formed an almost kinship like relationship with his best friend.

"Is she ok man" Sam knelt down next to Derek and tried to check Meredith's pulse but the second year resident only flinched away from his touch and closer to Derek.

"I don't know, I honestly have no clue as to what triggered this." Getting up with some help from Sam and Naomi as Meredith refused to let go of him, carrying her bridal style he headed for the closest empty exam room. He could tell that she had finally stopped muttering to her self but the tears she had been holding at bay were now silently streaming down her face, as stared at nothing.

"Derek?" her voice was scratchy and quite as if she was unused to using it but he heard anyway and bent his head down to look at her now tired and withdrawn face.

"Yeah, I'm here, I'm here and you're going to be ok" He pressed a kiss against her forehead and looked up to see that Naomi had found them an empty room. Meredith just sighed before closing her eyes, her breath evening out signalling she had fallen asleep.

Derek carried her into the room and placed her on the bed before checking her pulse and blood pressure. A knock at the door drew his attention.

"Um excuse me DR Sheppard but I saw you bring in Meredith and I was just wondering if she is going to be ok?" Lexie Grey stood at the door fidgeting nervously, with a concerned look on her face.

Derek knew Meredith wouldn't want the whole hospital knowing about what had happened to her, but lately she had been getting better at talking to her sister so he nodded his head letting the younger Grey come in.

Things were silent as they waited for the others to arrive, Derek only wanted to go through this once and he didn't even have all the answers so the four of them waited silently until Naomi said she was going to check on Archer. This reminded Derek about his other patient Jen.

"Dr Grey, I have a pregnant patient waiting for an aneurism removal, could you please inform her and her husband that her surgery is going to have to wait until tomorrow, and that they will be having another doctor doing the procedure. " Lexie nodded and hurried out of the room, not showing her disappointment that she couldn't use her prize for winning the games today.

"Oh Mere, what's going on in that brain of yours?" Derek leaned closer to the bed and grasped onto her hand tightly, letting her know that he was still here for her. Sam came and patted his back gently letting Derek know that he was there for him.

Three minutes later and everyone they had been waiting for rushed into the room all talking at once. Derek for the most part ignored them and sighed at the peace being broken. Finally Richard took charge.

"Quiet!" Once he had every ones silence he finally turned to his head of Neurosurgery for answers.

"Derek would you mind filling us in on why exactly did you page us" Derek nodded and stood up, but before he could speak Meredith began thrashing and mumbling in her sleep. Christina went to the other side of the bed to help Derek hold her still, while he tried to wake her up.

"Come on Mere, wake up" In all the times he had shared her bed he could never remember her having such a vivid nightmare like she was now, looking over to Christina he was shocked to see that she wasn't all that surprised and by the way she was gripping her friend told him that she had done this before. Before he could think any further Meredith read forward screaming.

"Please just kill me" Then just like on the walkway all her strength seemed to leave her making her collapse back onto the bed as she began to cry. Christina frowned Meredith never cried, never, she would be a little unsettled after a nightmare but she never cried, not even after the real bad ones that involved Derek dying on her.

Derek just gathered her close and held onto her until she stopped. Taking a deep breath Meredith pulled away from him and finally noticed every one else in the room, blushing slightly she dropped her gaze to her hands which now rested in her lap.

"What are you guys doing here?" She couldn't look up at them, she didn't want to see there disappoint at how weak she was, crying over a stupid nightmare, however she couldn't stop the shudder that ran through her body, when she remembered exactly what she had been dreaming of.

"Dr Montgomery paged us 911 Meredith Grey, so here we are" George finally answered. Meredith nodded then started to get out of bed resisting both Derek's and Christina's attempts to keep her there.

"Well that was sweet of her, but really there's no need for you guys to be here I'm fine" She tried to get pass everyone that was blocking the doorway but no one seemed to move. She was about to forgo manners and just shove her way through when she felt a hand on her elbow, looking up she saw Derek looking at her concern written all over his face, making her sigh, she knew she wasn't going to get out of this that easily.

''Excuse me, I know you don't know me but you really didn't seem all that fine when you collapsed out in the hallway earlier." Now she really had every ones attention making her sigh again. She didn't have time for this, she had a very important phone call to make but she needed to come up with something believable so they would leave her alone long enough to do it.

"Oh that, that was nothing, I just have eaten today, so if you guy's don't mind I'm just going to quickly go to the cafeteria and get something to eat before getting back to work." This time she didn't give anyone a chance to argue she got passed everyone and through the door before anyone could stop her.

Derek didn't believe for a second, he knew that the phone call she had received was the cause for everything, and he wished he knew what it had been about. He was also worried; they had gotten much better at talking about things to each other lately. So now that Meredith has gone back to the avoiding didn't help him get any calmer.

"Sheppard what has the girl gotten herself into now, and should I be worried about her killing any patients today." Derek looked over to the short Chief resident and just shook his head before following his girlfriend out.

He'll be damned if he doesn't get the answers he's looking for and soon. Derek refused to let Meredith go back to hiding and avoiding all her problems. They were in this together now, and he was going to remind her of that.

**A.N I don't know if I like this chapter, that much. I'm trying to get the right feel for this but part of me feels like I'm falling flat. So any suggestions will be really appreciated as I wanna do our favourite character justice. Also more on the mysterious caller next chapter.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**A.N Warning there is mention of rape in this chapter, so if that disturbs you then you can skip over it. I also want you to know that I do not take rape lightly and fully understand that it can do lasting emotional and psychological damage and that it can also kill the intended victim. **

**Chapter 3**

When Derek left the crowded exam room, he look down the hallway trying to spot his girlfriend, sighing when he didn't any sign of here, he began to ask the nurses in the hall if they had seen her at all. He was on his fifth nurse and was beginning to lose hope when the nurse kindly said that she had spotted Dr Grey head into the on-call room down the hall.

Derek thanked her and headed towards the room pausing only when he was directly opposite the door , taking a breath he reached for the handle praying that Meredith hadn't locked the door, when the handle turned he sighed in relief and slowly entered the room gently knocking on the door as he did.

"Mere?" it was so quiet in the room that he almost feared that he had gotten the wrong room, but then his heart broke a little, and his slight anger at her avoiding the situation dimmed a little when he spotted her on the lower bunk. She was sitting down with her back against the wall and her knees pushed up against her chest, with her arms around them, while her head rested gently on top.

"Derek, I'm sorry" Lifting her head, Derek saw that her cheeks were damp and her eye's blood shot.

"For what?" Meredith shifted a little; signalling she wanted him to sit next to her, when he did she immediately leaned into him.

"For running away, instead of talking about it, I just need to let you know that this has nothing to do with not trusting you, cause I do. Trust you that is, and I know that when I built the house of candles I said I didn't know if I did, so I wanted you to know that I trust you, and that I love you." She was rambling and she knew it, but for once she didn't really care because she was rambling about something important to the most important person in her life.

"I love you too" Derek wrapped his arm around her bringing her closer, he was right at this moment incredibly happy, the love of his life trusted him and had admitted to avoiding something.

"I um have to tell you something, and I don't know exactly how you are going to take it, so i'm going to ask that you wait until I have finished speaking before you react, and afterwards if you decide that you no longer want to be with me then I completely understand. I mean I'll be devastated but I will accept it and let you move on, without any hassle. "She paused to take a breath.

"Mere . . ."Derek tried to speak but Meredith cut him off.

"No you need to promise me that you will not interrupt, because if you interrupt then I might not be able to finish what I have to tell you, and I have to tell you everything. So right now I need you to promise me that you won't interrupt or react in any way until I finished telling you ok" Meredith turned her head so she look straight into his eye's, she needed him to understand how important this was to her. They seemed to stay like that forever, just staring into each others eye's until Derek slowly nodded.

"Ok I promise" Meredith sighed and removed one of her arms from around her knees to embrace one of his hands squeezing slightly to convoy her thanks before gathering her courage to begin to tell him the worst experience of her life in Boston.

"I was fifteen and this was before all the black and pink hair, I still didn't have many friends and none like I have now but there was this one group I used to hang with after school and on some weekends. We did some pretty wild things but mostly it was just drinking and smoking in some random parking lot. It was better than going home to any empty house and being all alone. Anyway one weekend we somehow ended up at this guy's house, I had never been there before but apparently he was friends with one of the main people in the group, and that he would get alcohol and smokes for us." Meredith had to stop for a second to wipe the steady stream of tears of her face and suck in a shaky breath. She hadn't realized that Derek had pulled her onto his lap and now was holding her securely with both arms, with one of his hands occasionally rubbing her back soothingly.

"What I didn't know was what he wanted in exchange for the smokes and alcohol. He must've been twenty-two or three back then; most of us were between fifteen and nineteen. That first time nothing really happened I got introduced to him, and he seemed nice and I thought he was pretty cool letting us hang out at his place. I was so busy getting drunk and listening to music I didn't notice when Samantha; who was probably the person I was closest to went missing along with the guy and some of the older boys. Nor did I notice that when she came back that she had been crying and that her clothes looked wrinkled and a little torn.

We went back a couple of times and this guy would um spend a lot of time with me, I just thought he was being nice, I was the youngest there and for some reason Samantha had stopped hanging out with us. We exchanged numbers and when we weren't at his place he would txt me all these really nice things saying, that he thought what I had worn the last time looked really good on me, and he would be really supportive when I ranted about my mother. It wasn't until he started showing up after school saying that he had to see me and got a little more descriptive with his texts that I started to get nervous. I never let any of my friends come to my house in case my mother was there. Then one day I was in my room changing out of the clothes I had worn to school, I had just taken them off and was getting different clothes to put on when my phone rang." By this time Meredith had began to shake, she was so in absorbed in telling her softly that she hadn't noticed that Derek's grip on her body had been getting tighter and tighter, until she shifted a little and he loosened his grip.

"I thought it was my mom, telling me like usual that she wasn't going to be home for dinner, none of my friends called me, if we were to meet somewhere one of them would just txt me the details. So when I answered I was completely unprepared when his voice came from the other end. When I asked why he was calling me he said that he had to tell me how great I looked in my underwear, and that I had a great body for someone my age. To say I was shocked was an understatement, I hanged up, put on my robe went to the window, I didn't see anything but I heard a car engine start and wheels screech like someone was leaving in a hurry. I closed my curtains and quickly finished changing. That night when one of my friends asked if I wanted to hang with them down at the docks I declined, I had already made up my mind to stop spending any more time with them. That's when I remembered back to the night Samantha disappeared and I shuddered as I realized why she had been crying and why her clothes were like they were. For the first time since my mother had stopped hiring a nanny for me I was thankful that I was alone in the house. I cried my self to sleep that night." Derek was thinking some very dark thoughts if the guy was in this very room Derek wouldn't of been certain he could've refrained from killing him, and somehow he knew it was only going to get worse. He focused on making sure Meredith knew that he was there for her, his hand now constantly rubbing soothing circles on her back and every now and then he would give her a light squeeze with the arm that had remained around her holding her close to him, but he promised not to speak or react until she had finished and he was going to keep his word. He was so focused on his actions he almost missed what she had to say next.

"So for the next couple of weeks I ignored all the texts from him and my friends, I had heard that Sam had been transferred to an all girl's school, not that I could blame her at all. If I saw that guy waiting outside of school I would wait until a large group of students passed by and would merge myself with them so he wouldn't see me leave. Then one night I was by myself at home like usual and the door bell rang I thought it was just the pizza that I had ordered, but when I opened the door, all I saw was a bunch of black roses my doorstep. I still don't know why I picked them up, most likely so my mother wouldn't see them when she got home. There was a card and for some reason I couldn't not read it. Derek up until that card I wasn't that scared of him, he hadn't tried anything after that call and had even stopped texting me when it became clear I wasn't going to answer him, but that card scared me, it really scared me. In it was written. _'My dear Meredith, soon I will have you and your soul will become as black as these roses when I'm finished with you._'" Meredith once again had to stop so she could get her breathing under control so she could finish, she had to finish so Derek knew exactly how screwed up she really was.

"I did the only thing I could think of, I called the police I didn't want my mother knowing what was going on, I think I was afraid she would think that I had enticed him to act like this, back then she already thought all I ever did was skip school and sleep around, she never looked at my school report cards, never knew that I got straight A's in almost every subject. All she cared about was the phone calls she would receive from my teachers when I didn't show up for class or got caught drinking on school property. The police showed up and as calmly as I could I explained everything, including my suspicions about Sam. They wrote down everything I said and cautioned me to stay indoors and not go out except to school, and always try to walk with someone when I did go out. I asked them not to inform my mother and they said as long as things didn't progress they had no need to. I was so relieved they took the flowers for testing and for prints and said they would get back to me, I gave them my cell number so my mom couldn't accidently answer the phone and find out what was happening." Derek was finding it very hard not to put Meredith on the bed and hit the wall; he was beginning to understand why she never had a proper relationship until him, why she didn't trust people easily. He was saddened that she had to deal with this at such a young age and she kept it from her mother to, not that it would've been too hard to do, from his understand Ellis wasn't home enough to take an interest in her daughters life.

"I didn't hear anything for a while but then one Friday on my way home I noticed a car was following me, I must've been a block from my house when it pulled up next to me and the door opened, when I saw who it was I tried to run, but he was faster, he grabbed me and placed a cloth covered in chloroform over my face. Then everything got blurry, the next thing I clearly remember is waking up in a strange bedroom, my head was foggy and my throat was dry but I managed to sit up. I realized that I was only in my underwear, so I grabbed the blanket from the bed to cover myself up and slowly stood up and walked to the door only to find it locked. I don't know how long I was left in the room by myself but eventually he entered. He started spouting off some crap that we were soul mates and that I felt the same way he did I just didn't know it yet, That I had to be shown that we were made for each other, when he tried to touch me I pushed him back, which just made him laugh before he hit me across so fast I think I lost consciousness for a couple of seconds, because then he was on top of me and he had removed the blanket that I used to cover myself with." By now Meredith was sobbing so hard that she had to stop talking so she could breathe in between each sob. Derek just held her closer and continued to rub her back, thankful that for once that none of their pagers had gone off with an emergency or just someone trying to locate them.

Meredith deserved her privacy and in the past it wasn't something he had really gotten inside this hospital. Guilt washed over him as he realized that he was partly responsible for that. Meredith had enough problems trying to prove herself, to show everyone that she wasn't just her mother's daughter that she herself deserved to be in the programme for her own skills, not because her name was Grey. That she didn't need the hospital thinking she was sleeping with her boss to get ahead and she had tried to tell him that. A sudden thought crossed his mind but before he could process it any further he noticed that Meredith had calmed down enough to carry on talking.

"I fought him so hard, every time he tried to kiss me I just bit him, I punched and kicked and scratched, but he was bigger and stronger than me and it only took a couple of punches in the right places for him to overpower me. I just closed my eyes and began to scream hoping the neighbours would hear me and call the police, he didn't even try to stop me just let me scream as he took the last pieces of my clothing and his off and then well I'm sure I don't have to spell it out for you. When he finished he just pulled out and laughed at me, I don't even remember when I had stopped screaming or when I had started crying. I was trying not to gag when he leaned down kissed me hard and told me very straight forwardly that he had fun and couldn't wait for round two, but for now he was hungry and needed to eat.

I couldn't even try to cover myself back up or try to run for the door, though I had noticed he hadn't locked it when he had come in. I just curled into a ball and sobbed until I was numb." Meredith's voice had turned cold and clinical when she was speaking this part of her story and Derek didn't care, she could use whatever she had to so that she could deal with it. A part of him wanted to tell her stop, that he didn't, couldn't hear anymore because right now his heart was breaking for her. She had suffered through so much and she was still this amazing, caring person she was today, made him fill with pride, he knew that some rape victims never recovered from their ordeal. He vowed right then and there to never hurt this amazing woman in his lap ever again. He thought briefly of the ring hiding in the house and knew he had made the right decision to ask her to marry him. Now all he needed to do was ask.

"At one point I decided that I wasn't going to let that man violate me again, I don't know what came over me, but I heard him coming back and somehow I put my underwear back on and grabbed the lamp that was by the bed and waited by the door. I don't think any of his other victims had ever thought to put up a fight otherwise he wouldn't have been as careless as he was. I waited until he opened the door and had stepped into the room when I smashed the lamp over his head, he went down and ran from the room, I soon realized that I was in the house my friends had taken me to, I knew that the neighbour hood was pretty respectable. I had a mantra running through my head, get outside, get help, and survive. I can't really remember what happened next, but somehow I made it to a different house, they gave me something to cover myself with and a glass of water while they called the police. I was taken to an ambulance and I asked them not to take me to Boston General, I really couldn't face my mother right then.

It wasn't until the police were questioning me was I informed that the man who had raped me, who had stolen my virginity had got away. I was introduced to an Agent Thomson; he was nice and explained that they were doing everything they could to find the man responsible. Then I asked if I could go home. The next day I asked mom if I could change schools claiming the one I was at was too easy for me. She agreed, I told Agent Thomson that I didn't want my mother to know, at first he disagreed with me but I wouldn't budge. So I changed schools, and decided that I would never trust a man ever.

That's when the black clothing and pink hair began also the one-night stands began soon after that. I think I was trying to show whoever that I wasn't affected y what had happened and that I could still have sex whenever I wanted. Agent Thomson kept me informed as much as possible, but it appeared that he had managed to leave the country, and up until earlier I hadn't heard from him since." Meredith took a deep breath and kept her head against Derek's chest, never had she felt so drained, the story took everything out of her and she was glad it was Derek she had told it to.

Right now though she was scared of his reaction, scared that this was the thing that finally scared him away from her, and she just didn't know what she would do if that happened. She would let him go as promised but she would probably have to transfer to a different hospital just to keep the promise.

"Meredith I need you to look at me, please" Derek sighed when he saw his girlfriends tear stricken face and red eye's. He did the only thing he could think to do; he leaned down and softly placed his lips against hers. He felt her stiffen a little in shock as if this was the last thing she thought he would do, but soon he felt her relax against him and soon he felt her arms come up to wrap around his head as the kiss got deeper. He decided that the best way to prove that he still loved her and wasn't going anywhere was to show her.

He took things very slowly knowing she would be shaken after what she had told him, he let her take the lead, let her set the pace. Once Meredith realized what he was doing her heart felt lighter, she knew in that instant that he wasn't disgusted by her, that he still loved her and was going nowhere. She let her hands run down his chest as she pulled his scrub top of while falling backwards so she now lay on the bed. Opening her arms she beckoned him to join her which he wasted no time in doing, and together they showed their love for each other, the best way they knew how.

Afterwards as Meredith was basking in the safety he brought to her he felt him move on to his side with one arm supporting his head, she was reminded of the times she would wake up and find that he had been watching her sleep, except instead of the loving admiration she was use to see on his face, it was now showing pensive thoughtfulness.

Mere, I just realized you never mentioned that guy's name, not even once, is it your way of making him less human, if he doesn't have a name then he isn't human, it wasn't someone you knew that did it to you" Meredith sighed and intertwined their hands bringing them to her chest to rest lightly.

"Jack Simmons, his name is Jack Simmons" She looked up into his eyes and smiled slightly.

"I love you" she whispered her eyes getting heavy with sleep.

'I love you too" Derek said laying back down and gathering her tired form into his arms and just as she was falling asleep he placed a soft kiss on her forehead and whispered softly.

"And I'm not going anywhere."

**A.N Wow ok I know that this is a lot to process, and no Meredith still hasn't made that important phone call mentioned in the previous chapter. So I know this was a pretty full on chapter with a lot of information, but I hoped it help give you guys some answers. Please let me know what you think, also I'm going to change the rating for future chapters.**

**Big Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**A.N I'm so sorry for the lack of updates, It was Mother's Day the other weekend in New Zealand and my brother got her twilight on DVD, I have never thought much of it to be honest and I hadn't formed an opinion while watching the movie, but then my mom finally managed to get me to read the damn book and I was hooked, which isn't really a shock if you knew me at all. So yeah for the past couple of weeks I've been caught up in the world of twilight. Forgive me please. **

**Chapter 4**

It was the beeping of a pager that drew Derek out of his sleep, quickly looking down he was relieved to see that Meredith was still asleep next to him. The beeping continued and he quickly shifted Meredith so he could find out which pager was going off, finally he managed to find the correct one when he felt Meredith shifting next to him.

"Wha . . . ?" She was still a little foggy from sleep and he couldn't but help but think that she looked like the most adorable woman on the planet.

"Bailey is looking for you" he stated smirking when he heard her groan. He got up and started to pull his scrubs back on as he handed hers to her as well. Muttering under her breath Meredith got dressed all the while wishing she hadn't gotten out of bed that morning.

"Are you going to be alright, or would you like me to come with you?" Meredith paused as she realized that her chief resident was going to expect answers for her behaviour and disappearance in the middle of a shift, something she didn't want to have to explain again so soon. She sat up suddenly as she remembered the reason for coming in here in the first place.

"Shoot, I need my phone" Derek watched as she patted her pockets trying to locate her phone, when that turned up nothing she looked to the floor until finally she crouched down by the bed and looked under it.

"What about Bailey, you know she won't give up until she knows everything" Derek didn't want Meredith under any more stress until that sick bastard was caught. He frowned when she just held up a finger while dialling a number on her phone.

While Meredith waited for someone to answer she saw Derek's annoyed face out the corner of her eye, she sighed and held out her hand for him to take, smiling she gave it a squeeze as someone picked up on the other end.

"Agent Brian Thomson speaking" She almost giggled at the familiar voice, when she was fifteen he was the rookie in his division and he still sounded the same.

"Agent Thomson this is Meredith Grey, do you remember me?" She saw Derek's face relax as began to understand who she was talking to.

"Oh Meredith of course, how have you been, still in Boston?" Meredith did giggle then he was still the same.

"No actually I relocated to Seattle for my residency, and I've been better, he called me today." The silence was deafening as the detective took in the information.

"Ok, I'm going to get things in order so I can head there, I want you to write down everything you can remember he said, then any background noise you can remember. You say you've started your residency what hospital are you at, and do you have anyone you can stay with until we can get proper protection sorted." Meredith could tell he was moving things around as he spoke in a rush to get things sorted she didn't realize he had stopped speaking and was waiting for an answer until he said her name again.

"Oh I work at Seattle Grace, and I live with my boyfriend and a couple of other residents from the hospital. So I'll be fine." She felt Derek pull on her arm and she let him pull her closer so he could wrap his arms around her. He honestly didn't know how she could sound so calm through all of this.

"That's good I'll probably be there tomorrow evening, will you be at work or home?" Meredith had to think about it but then realized she would be on late tomorrow. They agreed to meet at the hospital and Meredith made it clear that Derek was going to be with her.

Hanging up she turned around in Derek's arms and sighed loudly, she smiled slightly when she felt him bend down and place a kiss in her hair. Reluctantly she pulled away and looked up at him with sad eyes.

"Come on let's go face Bailey and we should probably inform the chief as well." She paused and thought for a moment before continuing.

"Also Lexie should be there" Nodding to herself she went and unlocked the door and headed out to find her chief resident. Derek was right behind her with a gentle hand on her back, he was confused on why Lexie had to be there but right now he trusted Meredith knew what she was doing.

It didn't take long to locate the short resident and a quick page to Lexie's pager told her where to meet them. Bailey was suspicious and a little mad at Meredith for taking so long to respond to her page, but Meredith calmly explained that everything will be discussed once they reached the cheif's office.

Derek was slightly worried about Meredith's sudden calmness; it almost reminded him of the times when she refused to show any emotion and claiming that she was fine up until the point where that word got banned from her vocabulary. However this was different he didn't know how exactly but he knew it was.

Lexie Grey was waiting outside the chief's office pacing nervously while playing with the watch on her wrist. When she spotted them she came up to the group and quite suddenly threw her arms around Meredith.

"Oh God Mere, You've had us all worried, Mark filled me on what happened in the exam room and how you just got up and left without telling anyone what was happening, because none of them believed that story about not eating. Then I get this page and Christina is all like demanding that I report back to her everything that I find out and that I should warn you, that if you don't fill her in soon she is going to come and beat it out of you." It looked like Lexie would keep on rambling until Meredith just pulled her in for a tighter hug.

"Did you even breathe?" Before anyone else could say anything the door to Richard's office opened and Patricia motioned for them to enter before she left to give them privacy. Once everyone was seated, Richard at his desk, Bailey in the chair opposite with Lexie in the chair opposite the couch where Meredith and Derek sat hand in hand Meredith began an abbreviated version to her story, but adding in one important fact she hadn't told Derek.

Meredith turned and looked at her half-sister with a serious expression.

"In his call today, he threatened you. I don't even know how he knows about you but he does, so from now on you are not to be at home by yourself. You will have Izzy, Alex, Derek or myself take you to and from work." At her sister's expression she got up and crouched next to her.

"I know it seems a bit extreme, but it goes for me too. I know I haven't been the greatest sister to you since we have met, but I'm telling you now that man is not touching you." Lexie was crying by the end of Meredith's statement and she knew that there was something she had to tell her and Derek.

"Um I need to page Mark" Lexie looked to the chief who just motioned towards the phone before turning back to Meredith.

"I don't understand why you didn't mention anything to me about it, you know Adele would've taken you in and treated you like her own. She loves you like a daughter Meredith." Meredith just chuckled at this and turned back to Derek.

"Right even if I did remember you guys back then, I wouldn't do that to her, she didn't need the trouble I was back then, especially since I was your mistress's daughter." Meredith ignored Bailey's gasped and watched as Lexie sat back in her chair, she wondered why the younger Grey had to page Mark, she didn't have long to wonder as the door opened and the plastic surgeon himself entered.

'I was paged here, didn't know we were having a party, I would've brought chips or something." Everyone just ignored his statement as they looked to Lexie waiting for her to explain his presence in the room.

"I thought that with everything going on it would be better for everyone if they knew the truth" Lexie began half speaking to Mark, and half speaking to Meredith and Derek begging them all to understand. Mark's face suddenly looked nervous and he refused to meet Derek's eyes.

"Mark and I have been seeing each other." That simple statement silenced the room until Derek stood up and stalked over to Mark, but before he could punch his best friend Meredith spoke up.

"Mark, are you using my sister for sex, or is this an actual relationship?" Meredith asked not looking away from Lexie.

"We're happy together" was Mark's reply. Meredith nodded then stood up patted her sister's arm then looked to the chief.

"When Agent Thomson arrives tomorrow, do you want me to bring him here or to a conference room?" She waited while he made up his mind looking at Bailey and gave her a small smile.

"Take him to a conference room, I would like the other residents to be there as well if you don't mind" Meredith nodded her head and grabbed Derek's hand.

"Ok well we are going to head home for the night if you don't mind Dr Bailey"

"No that's fine I'll get someone to cover the rest of your shift Grey." Thanking her superior Meredith led Derek out of the office only pausing when Derek stopped by Mark.

"DO NOT HURT HER" Meredith was proud he didn't yell or anything, she guessed it was because of her reaction, but you could still hear the threat in his voice. Tugging on his arm Meredith led him to the elevators, so they could get changed and head home, to relax and prepare for tomorrow.

**A.N. So what do you think, I will have the private practice characters leave in the next chapter I think. So you know I have not seen the Private practice episodes of the cross-over yet, but luckily they are now playing in New Zealand, yes that's how far behind we are sucky isn't it. Remember constructive criticism **helps** me to improve.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**Chapter 5**

**A.N Again I am sorry in the slow updating, I'm the queen of procrastination, and I'll try harder to be more diligent with my updating.**

**Lexie & Mark**

Lexie shifted nervously next to Mark as they walked down the corridor to continue or finish their shifts respectively. After Derek and Meredith had left, both the Chief and Bailey had lectured them on Attending/Intern relationships, never minding the fact that Mark was a head of department as well.

"So are you mad that I told them?" She saw Mark glance down briefly before gently grabbing her elbow and steering her into the on-call room they were about to pass. Shutting the door she went to sit on the bed while Mark stayed at the door.

"I'm not mad, confused about the timing and everything, especially Big Grey, she seemed a little out of it if you ask me" Mark rubbed his face and sat next to Lexie on the bed.

"Um yeah, there probably is something you should know." Lexie then explained about she had been called to the office for and what Meredith had told her. She was surprised when Mark got off the bed and crouched in front of her on the floor, with one hand he wiped off the tears she didn't know she had been crying.

"Hey, its okay, me and Shep are not going to let anything happen to either of you, speaking of which I feel sorry for him, this has to majorly put a hold to any proposing he was going to do." Lexie smiled at Mark's statement and did something that was still a little uncommon for them she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Mark just holding them. They stayed like that until Lexie's pager went off signalling them back to the real world.

**Meredith and Derek**

Meredith knew that her sudden calm behaviour was confusing Derek, but truthfully she was getting a little tired of the drama that was her life, it seemed that every time she had started to get happy something would come along to disrupt it. So today she just wasn't going to let it other her, she will have plenty opportunity in the upcoming day's to freak out about something so she was taking tonight to relax with her boyfriend in the comfort of their home.

"Hey, we're home" Meredith turned to face Derek at the sound of his voice and took note of their surroundings.

"Oh" She heard Derek sigh next to her so she caught his hand before he could exit the vehicle, at his imploring gaze Meredith decided to share her feelings with him.

"Look I promise that tomorrow I will let you worry all you want about me and hover around, with little complaint but for tonight can we please just forget the stupid phone call ever happened and just relax, I know peace and quiet won't be something we'll be getting a lot of soon." Derek held her gaze for a moment before leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on her lips, before squeezing her hand and getting out of the car.

Once inside they headed to the kitchen, which was still slightly messy from Izzy's card making project for the interns, which Meredith remembered that Lexie had won, reminding herself to congratulate her later, she got a couple of wine glasses out before heading to a cupboard to choose a wine, while Derek started on dinner.

"How does pasta sound?" He asked as he got pots and ingredients out.

"Sounds lovely, you have red wine with that right?" Seeing his nod Meredith quickly poured them each a glass and took a sip out of hers before handing Derek his glass, watching as he tasted it before taking a bigger sip. Meredith couldn't really tell the difference in taste between wines but she knew which ones he liked and which ones he didn't, this happened to be one of his favourites.

"So Mark and Lexie huh, who would've thought" Out of the corner of her eye she saw Derek tense before going back to preparing the meal. She sighed and got off her stool to embrace him from behind.

"Look I know you told him not to go there, but they are both adults and we don't really have any say in their lives" she paused before shrugging slightly and headed back to her seat.

"You never know they may be exactly what they need right now." She saw him put a lid on and turn to her.

"When did you become so certain optimistic, what happened to the Meredith that use to declare herself dark and twisty?" She giggled and took another swallow of her drink.

"Oh she is still here, but you know here we are in my mother's kitchen having an adult conversation and despite what has happened today, we are relatively happy right now, and I guess I don't to take that away from anyone who has the chance of finding this. Cause right now Derek sitting here with you is the highlight of my week." She smiled as Derek placed his wine glass down and gently cradled her face in his hands before passionately kissing her.

Meredith moaned into his mouth as she gave entrance to his tongue and entwined her fingers in his hair. This right here is what she lived for, no roommates to disturb them just her and Derek sharing a private moment while they wait for dinner to cook.

"I love you so much; it astounds me how you turned into this beautiful and amazing woman despite everything that has happened to you." Meredith sighed and rested her head on his chest as he placed soft kisses on her hair.

"I love you too, I promise you no more running ever." She looked up into his eyes and almost gasped at the amount of love shinning from them, wrapping her arms around his neck Meredith leaned up and lost herself in his kisses.

**A.N So yep this is mostly a filler chapter, I hope it is ok, and realistic to the show, it's so hard to get into their heads sometimes. Anyway please review I always am eager to hear about what you think. I know I said that the Private Practise people would leave in this chapter but I'll leave that till the next. Until next time.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**Chapter 6**

Meredith glanced down at her pager, checking to make sure it hadn't gone off without her knowing about it, but her quick glance revealed that it was blank. She sighed as she leant against the nurse's counter, trying to focus on the charts in front of her.

Last night had been wonderful the pasta Derek had made was beautiful and afterwards they just relaxed on the couch holding each other before retiring to their room to get lost in each other and their love. She was thankful that both Izzy and Alex were on call last night as Derek didn't stop showing his love for her until the early morning.

Now she was at work, she had scrubbed in with Bailey when she had got in, on a wipple before trying to get her charts sorted while waiting for Agent Thomson's arrival. It didn't help that she hadn't seem Derek since he left that morning for a craniotomy.

"Dr Grey" Meredith looked up to see Addison coming towards her; she waited until the red headed doctor was by her side. They had come to the conclusion that while they would never be real close friends they certainly didn't hate each other because of their past history with Derek.

"Dr Montgomery" Meredith acknowledge handing the chart she had just finished to the nurse stationed at the desk.

"Well I've come to say goodbye, Archer, Naomi and Sam have already gone to the airport, but I wanted to say goodbye to everyone before I left." Meredith nodded in response not knowing really what to say to that.

"Well, uh, have a safe trip back I guess" Meredith said and held out her hand which Addison took before leaving, as Meredith went back to her charts she heard her name being called, this time it was by her best friend.

"Do you know what's going on with Izzy? Cause she is doing this whole weird patient x with the interns. Honestly I don't know why she bothers, aside from Lexipedia there isn't really a decent one out of that bunch" So that's where her Interns had disappeared off to, and why she was stuck here doing charts.

"Did you just complement my sister?" Christina's eyebrow rose at the term Meredith used for Lexie.

"Since when did you call her sister, and it's only right that once in a while I compliment my Intern, who let me remind you, is the best out of the lot." Meredith laughed at Christina before moving away from the counter to head towards the lobby, she was in need of a caffeine fix, and she felt Christina fall into place next to her.

"Since now, I didn't even know about this patient x until you told me, I was just informed by Bailey that someone had requested the interns before we scrubbed in on a wipple." They paused at the elevators and Meredith pushed the button for down.

"Oh maybe Alex knows, I think he is with Dr Hunt today in the pit" Before Meredith could question her friend on the Owen issue Christina headed off down the hall way. The elevators dinged and Meredith patiently waited for the people to come off it before entering, when the doors closed she realized that she was the only one on it and took this time to sag against the wall.

On top of everything else Izzy was staring to act weird, though from what George had been telling her Izzy has been acting strange for a while. Checking her pager again Meredith waited for the elevator to get to the lobby. When the doors opened she was surprised to see Derek on the other side with two coffee's in his hands.

"Hey" He smiled and offered her one of the cups.

"Hey, how did you know I wanted a coffee?" Meredith asked after taking a sip.

"I didn't, but I know that you had scrubbed in with Bailey when you got in, and with Izzy hoarding the interns I gathered you might be a bit busier than normal and might want a pick me up." Meredith just smiled and had some more coffee and hit the button for the surgical floor. Derek opened his mouth to say something when he was cut off by a pager; Meredith's hand flew down to her waist and was relieved when it was her.

"Mine, Agent Thomson has arrived, guess it's time to tell everyone that a psycho is after me, god the gossip mill is going to love this" Meredith felt Derek's arms go around her and press a quick kiss to her head before stepping back when the doors opened.

"I will be right there with you the whole time, and you don't have to tell them everything just enough to keep them alert and safe." Meredith nodded and held out her free hand for him to take. Looking around he didn't see anyone who could be this Agent Thomson but followed when Meredith headed towards a man slightly older than himself.

"Hey Brian, it's good to see you again." A tall well built man, with soft brown hair turned around at the sound of Meredith's voice.

"Hey there, it's good to see you too, I wish it was under better circumstances thought" when the man had finished talking he was looking a Derek and kept glancing down to their entwined hands.

"Brian, this is my boyfriend Derek Sheppard, he is head of Nero here." Derek released Meredith's hand to shake the one, Agent Thomson had extended.

"I take it you have told him everything" at Meredith's nod he smiled and let her take charge. She went to the main desk and paged the chief Bailey and the other residents to conference room one before leading Derek and Agent Thomson there.

Derek smiled as he remembered the time when he had all the interns in here and was asking them for help with a patent, he was so proud of Meredith that day, and he knew that she would be an excellent doctor even without her mother's name. Now the three of them sat and waited for the others' to arrive.

**A.N. Ok I am a little sad that I only had four reviews to my last chapter, so I want to once again thank the ones that do review, also the ones who have this on their favourite or on alert, but I really can't improve my writing unless or fix things if you guys don't review, and all I want to do is give you guy's a real good story. So please try to review. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**I am really, really sorry about the lack of updates. There really is no excuse for it I am trying to sort out my RL at the moment and my best friend wants me to move in with her but ugh, so I'm using this as my therapy so it might just be a little chaotic and dark.**

**Chapter 7**

Meredith looked into the conference room filled with residents, some her friends others she didn't even know, then towards the four people standing next to her. At Agent Thomson's request Richard ad called the other hospitals around asking about and any patients that had been admitted because they had been sexually attacked recently.

It turned out that tree hospitals had received victims of rape all of them were petite with either dark brown or dirty blond hair, it didn't take them long to figure out that they were attacked by the same man, and that he had attacked woman who resembled Meredith's or Lexie's description.

"Meredith remember we don't have to tell them anything yet, just that there is a sexual predator in the area and that all women should be on alert, and to stay in groups outside the hospital." Meredith nodded at Brian before sucking in a deep breath and entering the conference room, she sat in between Christina and Izzy while Richard called the room to order.

"Ok people, I gather you are curious as to why you have been asked here. Yesterday one of our female residents got a disturbing pone call in her shift, I won't disclose on what was said, but we have asked Agent Brian Thomson here to go over some safety precautions. We have called other hospitals in the area and it seems that there is a sexual predator so until the man is caught I want everyone to take these precautions seriously."

Richard then let Agent Thomson take charge, when he neared the end of his speech he looked to Meredith who nodded her head, he then looked outside where Derek had waited and nodded to him to enter. They had come up with a signal, while Meredith didn't want everyone knowing that this mad man was after her she knew it would be safer for her friends to know.

"Ok that's it, but can I please have Dr's Torres, O'Malley, Stevens, Karev, Yang and Grey stay behind please, the rest I request that you pass this on to the interns and nurses a bulletin will be up shortly." As everyone left the room the others didn't see Derek enter until Meredith stood and made her way over to him. Callie was the first one to speak.

"Um sir why are we still here, I have patients to get to." Richard just grimaced and stayed silent everyone jumped when Christina jumped up and strode over to Meredith and looked into her eyes.

"He's after you isn't he, the phone call the Chief mentioned was the one you received yesterday, the sick bastard wants you doesn't he" Meredith shrank back against Derek as everyone stared at her with mixed reactions of horror and pity, except for Alex who looked like he wanted to punch someone. Gathering her strength Meredith went to sit in a chair Derek close behind her.

"Yeah it's me he wants, he um is angry that I got away from him when I was a teenager and now he is after me." She saw Christina sit down and just stare at her while Izzy came over to her and gave her a hug.

"He is also after Lexie though I suspect that he will go after anyone he deems is close to Meredith so we thought you guys should know so you'll be prepared just in case." Derek said looking over to Karev and shared a look between them he knew that they will protect all of their friends.

"How does he know about Lexie" George asked scared for his former room mate. Before anyone could answer Meredith's phone went off. She looked down at the caller ID and then looked up to Brian.

"It's him; it's the same number as yesterday." Derek crouched down next to her and placed a hand on her reassuringly. Giving him a small smile she answered the phone.

"What?"

"Oh my, is that how you answer a phone these day's its very rude you know, what would your poor mother think, oh that's right she's dead isn't she, now it's just you and your sister she does look beautiful, I wonder if she is a spitfire like you." Meredith closed her eyes and clenched her fists as she listened to Jack Simmons talk to her about Lexie.

"I don't know how you even know that my mother is dead, or about Lexie but I will stop you from touching her." Meredith faintly heard the faint gasps as she let the room know how much this man knew about her life.

"What are you going to do my dear, do you think that just because you have your boyfriend and your little police friend with you that you're safe, I got you once and I will get you again, and this time I won't let you go." Before Meredith could say anything Jack hung up and her pager went off. Looking down she noticed it was to the main nurse's desk. Ignoring everyone she left the room and headed to the desk.

"Hi I got paged" the nurse nodded and handed Meredith some papers, turning them around Meredith felt her blood freeze as se looked of photographs of her house with Lexie in front of it, of her entering the hospital with Christina and Izzy, and then leaving with Derek. The last was of her meeting Agent Thomson in the lobby. She started to feel dizzy and realized that she had stopped breathing, slowly she turned and made her way to the waiting room and sank into a chair.

"Meredith, Mere what is it" the sound of Derek's voice made her look up and she saw that Brian was with him as well, wordlessly she handed them the photos. Derek sat next to her and wrapped his arms around her.

"He won't tough you, or Lexie I promise, between Mark, Alex, George, Agent Thomson and myself he won't get near you girls." Derek looked into Meredith's eyes hating the fear he saw in them Meredith just nodded.

"I need to get back to work" she muttered as she stood up, she held up a hand when everyone started to protest.

"I will not let this man stop me from living my life and doing my job, I'm safe enough in the hospital." When it looked like no one was going to argue Meredith looked to her resident.

"Go to the pit, anything surgical comes in, scrub in if and only if you wont be distracted to the point of killing the patients life." Meredith nodded grateful to Bailey. She headed off to the pit noticing that Alex was beside her.

"So you did you get up to much last night, I bet you and Sheppard took real advantage to the empty house huh." Meredith laughed and shook her head, grateful that Alex was treating her like normal, at this moment she was very grateful for the family she had found here at Seattle Grace.

**A.N. So I need help, I can't figure out how people should find out about Izzy, do I do like the show, or a different way. Any opinions will be very helpful, so I hope you like this chapter and it's not too confusing.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Title: Forgotten Past**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them.**

**So not quite deviating from the main storyline here but I thought we would check to see how Izzy is doing, before heading back to Meredith and co.**

**Chapter 8**

**000000**

'_Stupid Sadie, how she ever managed to get into Seattle Grace as an Intern is beyond me' _Izzy sat in the residents locker room, staring at nothing, today had been a loaded day with learning that some creep was after Meredith and since she was a friend of Meredith's she was also in slight danger.

However that was taking a backseat to the information she had learned from the Interns, she thought it was so smart to have them diagnose her without them knowing. Patient X was a way to show them that they had the knowledge to do their jobs correctly without cutting on each other to learn, she tried to show them that their was more to surgery than just procedures and OR time, but learnt that they only thought they were getting a prize again. She lectured them before sending them away.

Lexie was the one who had come back to thank her, Lexie was the one who had made her come here and sit down and think. _'Screw the odds.'_ Izzy Stevens had always been good at beating the odds, she had grown up in a trailer park even gotten pregnant when she was a teenager, yet here she was in a good hospital becoming a surgeon what were those odds, were they better than five percent? Or was this the time when the odds finally worked against her.

Izzy sighed and rolled her shoulders working out the knots from the stress of the day. She thought back to Sadie, would she have had better chances if Meredith's friend hadn't mixed up the blood samples or was it too late back then, she decided since she had already hallucinated Denny that it was too late for her. _'Screw the odds.'_

Izzy knew she had to tell someone before her condition got worse, she was a liability to the hospital but how do you break it too people that you work with that you are sick to the point where death is most likely going to happen. She saw these people everyday, saw how they treated patients when they couldn't see them and she couldn't bring herself to become a piece of meat for them. Especially her friends and Alex, none of them had ever been this sick, the closest would be Meredith when she drowned in the bay and been physically dead for a few minutes.

Alex, the thought of her boyfriend almost brought Izzy to tears, he had been through so much in his life, and the whole Ava/Rebecca fiasco was too fresh in his mind, how could she tell him that she had a five percent chance to live. He had told her he loved her, he had picked her to assist in his first solo surgery, even though she had been absent with the hallucination of Denny at the time. He didn't deserve this, he deserved someone healthy and whole, someone who wasn't about to die on him, or be too sick to be anything but a burden. No Alex looked after too many people in his life already she couldn't tell him, but at the same time she couldn't not tell him. This cancer wasn't going to go away because she wanted it to. Life wasn't that kind.

"Are you finally finished daydreaming, so you can tell me what's going on in that fool brain of yours?" Izzy jumped as Bailey's voice broke through her thoughts. The urge to tell someone the truth became too much and Izzy blurted everything out before her mind could stop her.

"I've got stage four metastatic cancer, and I only have a five percent chance of survival and I don't know if I want treatment." There was stunned silence as she watched Bailey process the news.

"What do you mean you don't know if you want treatment? Five percent is better than zero percent and I know I didn't teach you to be a quitter." Izzy looked down not able to meet her chief resident and mentor in the eye.

"I see the way we treat patents here everyday, I will not become a piece of meat for my friends to fight over who gets to cut me open." Izzy saw out the corner of her eye Bailey moving to sit on the bench next to hers.

"Now I know you are talking crazy, we wouldn't let any of those armatures get close to you with a scalpel, only the best for one of our own, besides they are counted as family. I think personally a fool if you give up without a fight, you didn't get this far to give up now. Your Isabel Stevens you survived your fiancée dying, you survived growing up in a trailer park to become one damn fine doctor if I do say so myself. Then there is Alex and the rest of them fools, give them some credit they are stronger then you think." Bailey then stood up and headed towards the exit; before she could leave Izzy stopped her.

"Thank you could you help me get admitted and then page everyone for me." Bailey nodded and held the door open waiting for Izzy to pass through first. Holding her breath Bailey sent a quick prayer for her residents, how much more can they be put through.

****

Meredith focused very closely on her work, right now she was stitching up an eight year olds leg, he had cut it while climbing a tree. A little while ago Brian had come to inform her that the envelope containing the pictures had been hand delivered; unfortunately the nurse had been too busy to get a good look at the person who had dropped them off.

Tying off the last stitch she smiled up at the boy who had been holding his mothers hand tightly and not looking at what she had been doing. Putting a dressing on then bandaging it up she discharged them and went to the next patent when a trauma came in. Looking up she searched for Hunt to see if she was needed, at his nod she went and got a gown and joined him as the paramedics rolled in the patent.

"We have a twenty-seven year old female, looks to be the victim of sexual assault, wallet was found identifying her as Lucy Holdings. Bp is good and pulse is steady found unconscious at the scene." Meredith tuned the rest of the information out as she began to check the vitals. Pulling back the sheet she gasped and froze.

There written on to the skin in what she assumed was the patent lipstick was a message.

_To M & L G_

_Soon_

_JS_

Meredith put her hand up to her mouth to hold back the bile as she slid down the wall ignoring everyone calling her. This poor innocent person was injured and violated because of her. This time she couldn't hold the bile back and she threw up onto the floor as tears started to fall down her face.

Arms came out of nowhere to surround her and she began t panic until she registered that it was Derek holding her trying to get her to leave the room so the others could continue their work. With his help Meredith stood up and avoided looking at the patent they left.

Without looking Meredith could feel the eyes on her. She really hated the gossip that went on in this hospital and right now all the staring was getting to her, in her mind she saw accusations and then sympathy followed by pity and she couldn't take it, when she felt Derek try to get her seated in the waiting room she pulled on his arm to stop him.

"Not here, please, I feel like everyone is staring at me and I can't breathe with them watching me Derek, I can't break down in front of them, I won't" Derek just nodded kissed her head and began to lead them to the elevators. They were lucky and managed to get on to themselves.

Derek could feel how tense and scared Meredith was in his arms, and he hated it, this man hadn't even touched her physically and he was already hurting her, something Derek had promised he wouldn't be able to do. Even now when they were alone in the elevator she was still tense he had a feeling she wouldn't relax until they got to their destination. His office.

The doors opened up on their floor and Derek managed to get Meredith into his office without anyone stopping him, As soon as his door was closed behind him Meredith went and sat down on his couch and began to cry. He quickly went picked her up and sat back down cradling her on his lap.

"Its all my fault, he got that poor girl because of me Derek, how am I suppose to live with that. I couldn't even be her doctor because I let him get to me, what are we suppose to say to her family." Meredith felt her throat close up as another sob racked her slim frame as she clung to Derek desperately.

"I don't know what to say to make you feel better, it's not your fault, you didn't set this girl up to be raped and you especially didn't ask for this insane sick man to target you ok. We will leave her care to the others and her family to Agent Thompson right now we need to get you home." Derek felt her nod slightly and felt her wipe her face as she took some calming breaths.

At this point in time Derek didn't think he hated another living soul more than right now. The closet it came to was his father's murderer and even now he was grateful that he had just killed him. What this Jack Simmons was doing was sick and twisted and what was worse was the man got off on hurting these women.

When Meredith gathered herself up enough they left his office and at her request went to see if she could find Owen to see how the woman was doing, checking the OR board they saw that she was already being operated on and that both Hunt and Richard were working on her. They came across Christina who had heard what had happened and filled them in that she had internal injures and a broken pelvis. Before they could move they all got paged.

They looked at each other curiously when they realized that they had all been paged to the oncology ward and to the same room, they headed to the elevator and met up with Alex and George.

"Do you guys know what's going on with this page?" Alex said everyone just shook their heads as they patiently waited for the elevator to get them to the right floor. When they arrived and the doors opened they were shocked to see Bailey waiting for them with concern and sorrow adorning her normal calm face. She led them to a room where the blinds were closed and turned around before opening the door.

"Before I let you in this room you need to know a few things. Firstly that once you have crossed this doorway you are no longer doctors you are family and will be treated as such when it comes to her care. Secondly she is terrified right now and doesn't need your pity but your friendship and support and lastly if you don't show her that support I will personally make your lives more of a living hell then it is right now." Giving them all a stern look she opened the door and announced the patent like they were doing rounds.

"Izzy Stevens admitted for stage four metastatic cancer, with Mets on her brain liver and intestines will be needing surgery and chemo. Survival chances five percent." When bailey finished presenting the case silence reigned in the room as everyone took it in.

Alex was the first to react as he swore punched the wall and stormed out of the room, leaving a silent crying Izzy behind, Christina cautiously went up to the bed and read the chart not trying to call Bailey a liar but needing the written proof to believe it as George went up to Izzy's side and took her hand while smiling at her reassuringly. Meredith just stood there before blindly searching for Derek's hand with her own. Taking a deep breath she took a step closer to Izzy.

"Hey"

"Oh Mere I'm so sorry I know this is probably the last thing that you needed right now with some sicko trying to get you or your sister, I understand completely if its too much for you to be around me right now." Meredith just started to shake her head and went to the opposite side of the bed to George, taking Izzy's hand and giving her a small smile.

"Oh Iz, you have nothing to be sorry for. You didn't ask for this, right now you just concentrate on getting better for your own sake. Right now I have to go hunt down some boyfriend and make sure his hasn't hurt anyone or himself." With another pat to the hand Meredith left the room telling Derek to stay and exam Izzy's head CT's.

Looking around she saw a on-call room and decided that was the best bet to find Alex. She walked up to the room and just opened the door thankful that he hadn't decided to lock it If this is where he went. Luck was on her side as she saw her other roommate sitting on one of the lower bunks resting his head in his hands with his elbows on his knees.

"She told me that she was seeing Denny, and I laugh it off." Alex began as Meredith took a seat in one of the chairs in the room.

"Alex' she began but he cut her off.

"She told me she was seeing a dead person and I brush it off because of all the crazy that has happened to me recently what is one more thing you know. I'm a doctor for Christ sake and I don't do anything and now she's sick. She's so sick Mere and the treatment could be worse on her. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to handle this. What did you do when you learnt about your mother?" Meredith started at that and was silent as she took in Alex's upset form.

"I caught a plane back to the states and gave my mother as much help as she would let me give." Meredith answered truthfully taking a breath she looked at Alex in the eye.

"I know you are scared and confused right now, but so is Izzy and Alex you are probably the only she really wants to see right now, so I'm going to give you some advice, suck it up so you can be strong for her while your in front of her then breakdown when you are alone. I know this sucks but neither of you are alone in this you have all of us. Ok?" Alex took a couple of breaths and nodded then headed back to Izzy's room leaving Meredith alone since Derek dragged her out of trauma one.

She suddenly felt very tired everything that had happened draining her of the energy and before she knew it Meredith Grey had fallen asleep still in the same chair she had sat in when she first entered the room.

()()()()()()()

**A.N. I'm so sorry but my life is being a real suck-fest right now, and all inspiration to write has been taken from me. But since I have been having trouble sleeping I thought I put the time to some good use and get this chapter out. So I hope you enjoy it.**


End file.
